West Texas Guide to Computer Lingo

"Hard Drive" - Trying to climp a steep, muddy hill with 3 flat tires and
pulling a trailer load of fertilizer.
"Keyboard" - Place to hang your truck keys.
"Window" - Place in the truck to hang your gun.
"Floppy" - When you run out of Polygrip.
"Modem" - How to get rid of your dandelions.
"ROM" - Delicious when you mix it with coca cola.
"Byte" - First word in a kiss-off phrase.
"Reboot" - What you do when the first pair gets covered with barnyard stuff.
"Network" - Activity meant to provide bait for your trout line.
"Mouse" - Fuzzy, soft thing you stuff in your beer bottle in order to get a
free case.
"LAN" - To borrow as in, "Hey Delbert! LAN me yore truck."
"Cursor" - What some guys do when they are mad at their wives/girlfriends.
"Bit" - A wager as in "I bit you can't spit that watermelon seed across the
porch longways."
"Digital Control" - What yore fingers do on the TV remote.
"Packet" - What you do to a suitcase or Wal-Mart bag before a trip.